Cornered

The Jehovah's Witnesses have started a new tactic to convert me since I never answer my door when they ring the bell (even though I'm sure they can hear my TV, loud music or louder voice talking on Skype...). Their new game is called "corner the foreigner while she's eating."

I passed a few ladies on my way to my favorite little restaurant for dinner (well, broth soup and kimchi, hold the rice). Side note: I love this place because they allow me to customize practically all my orders which is rare in Korea. They know to fill my soup bowl, which I will refill myself, load my plate with kimchi, and usually 86 the rice.

One of the ladies came in soon after, but this time she had children with her. I'm sure her thinking was, "She's a foreigner, probably a teacher. She must be a sucker for cute Korean kids." She was right. I was engrossed in my book but did spare a few moments to make smiles with the wee ones.

Mid-meal, we accidentally make eye contact during my glance from my Kindle to my food. (I've learned the hard way that it's best not to try to use peripheral while eating and reading.) She took that opportunity to grin wildly and say, "Excuse me," as her invitation to sit next to me. She hands me a visibly dated brochure to read. Even though I'm 90 percent sure she's not a Christian trying to witness to me, I politely take a look and pretend to skim the words.

I guess she could tell I wasn't really reading it so she decided to take a more 2012 approach. I act like I'm less interested in the video she shows me (twice since she mistakenly hit a wrong button on her smart phone and started it over) than my food. I did actually read the English subtitles to the video, which were obviously translated by a self-taught Korean. They were talking about how God is a woman and then did a 180 and started a mini lesson on evolution? My soup was getting colder by the second so I, with as much politeness as I could possibly possess, kindly told her in Konglish that I'm Christian and have been since I was a baby, but her baby is really cute.

She was really nice about my decline and told me to enjoy my delicious meal (of broth and kimchi). I don't mind being cornered in a restaurant as much as my own apartment, but I also don't like cold soup. The lady was sure to leave her cell number just in case I changed my mind.


PS: My stomach is feeling much better! I only vomited once at work. ...That awkward moment when you sprint out of class towards the bathroom and all your students know that you're running to hurl... In any case, I considered the day a success.